One of the more comprehensive sources available online regarding Domestic Discipline (DD) is the blog "LovingDD" (http://lovingdd.blogspot.com). The author, who goes by the unfortunate psuedonym of "Mr. Loving DD," has a lot of helpful insights into this topic and I would recommend reading his material. (Speaking for myself, I've found his posts on male/female energies to be particularly insightful).
That said, there are some warning flags that bear considering when reading his blog and since posting to his site requires me to reveal what I consider to be inapppropriate personal details, I thought I'd share them here in hopes that they will help anyone interested in learning about DD.
1. He refuses to provide any details or information about his background and experience with DD or his relationship status. While, unfortunately, anonymity is an unfortunate necessity when posting on this topic, anyone who claims to be an expert on a subject has, I believe, an ethical responsibility to divulge enough information about his experience and background to justify taking him as a credible source (especially in an area as controversial and potentially volatile and sensitive as DD). If he's really an expert, he should have no problem posting a bio detailing the source of his expertise. And if he's just a normal person who believes he has something useful to share (like me), that's great -- but he still has an obligation to disclose his background to so that people can evaluate his material in the context of his experiences.
2. He's written literally hundreds of pages on DD and discipline (and self-published two bookson the subject), but we never hear one word from his partner. Perhaps this is because he doesn't have one and is merely speculating and engaging in wishful thinking without any "field experience" to back it up? Hard to say, but without her perspective, it's a bit hard to take his more extreme positions seriously. (How about a post on how SHE feels about the difference between humiliation and humility?)
3. He frequently encourages the women who post on his site to call him "Mr." and "Sir," and has started a somewhat bizarre trend in which women debase themselves to him as part of their "discipline."
4. He has recently begun requiring women who wish to comment on his articles to his site to post the intimate details of their discipline. While this type of behavior might be appropriate and titillating on a BDSM site, it seems to me to be far from what DD is meant to be, and a bit of a case of "power corrupts." Perhaps this is just overzealousness or simple human error. On the other hand, perhaps it's 's urther evidence that the author of this site does not have real life experience in a DD relationship and is instead a latent abuser who needs to get his "fix" by dominating the women who read his blog. Since he's created an environment in which he doesn't allow anyone (least of all women) to question his material, I suspect he's getting a little out of control with his own issues of dominance and submission. That's often what happens when someone in a position of power is allowed to do his thing without criticism or feedback.
5. He routinely encourages and approves of discipline that, at least to me, seems to cross the line from discipline into abuse. Some examples:
- Approving a post in which a woman's punishment for poor housecleaning was to lick the furniture clean.
- Approving multiple posts which encourage public nudity and humiliation as a disciplinary tool. (example: doing naked corner time in the presence of friends, family and strangers).
- Writing an entire chapter in his new book, "Advanced Loving DD," on why humiliation is an essential part of DD. (see the article on this blog regarding this issue, "Humiliation vs. Humility")
The point is, please read his posts with a bit of caution and do not consider the "Loving DD" blog to be the ultimate authority on what DD is and should be. Please use common sense and good judgement when evaluating the advice of anyone, particularly someone whose background and credentials are being deliberately concealed.